A 40-year-old dad says that after reaching the kind of stability he once equated with success, he is no longer sure what should give life meaning once having "enough" no longer feels like the goal.
Here's what to know
In a post on Reddit's r/simpleliving subreddit, he said growing up in communist-era Poland during the 1980s and 1990s shaped his perspective, and he asked what people build their lives around when comfort and financial security are already in place.
He framed his experience as a move from deprivation to plenty. After Poland opened up, he wrote, access to better goods and newer technology came to represent advancement, from VHS tapes and cassettes to smartphones and AI.
At 40, though, he said ordinary parts of life like hobbies, socializing, and even time with family can start to revolve around purchases, upgrades, or paid activities. He has the job, family, home, and modern conveniences but doesn't want the extras to define him.
He summed up his fears: "I don't want to spend the next 40 years simply earning money and finding new ways to spend it."
Many replies pointed toward low-cost, concrete alternatives. One commenter reduced the answer to four short prompts: "Creation. Garden. Make art. Cook meals."
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A professional mountain guide said they changed their experience by owning less, not more. After trimming down duplicate equipment and sticking to just "the one" item in each category, the commenter wrote, "It made my sports feel incredibly pure. It was never about the gear ever again."
More background
The original poster also said the issue showed up in small routines, not only big-ticket spending. He wrote that free time often drifted into scrolling products, consuming content, or comparing the next bike, device, trip, or upgrade. Fatherhood sharpened that concern because his time no longer felt unlimited.
Several commenters said the alternative to buying more often lies in where attention goes. One person who shared they also grew up in communism answered with "nature + culture + community," then listed cat-sitting for a friend, going to an album launch, dancing salsa, attending a symphonic concert, and sharing meals with friends.
"Cost was minimal," the commenter wrote. "It was emotionally, intellectually, socially fulfilling and I didn't bring anything back home."
Another commenter revealed they tried to weaken consumer habits at the source. They wrote that they deleted every social platform except Reddit, canceled Amazon and delivery subscriptions including Instacart and Walmart+, and kept only one streaming service. That, they said, opened up more time for museums, gardens, ghost towns, and theater outings with their children.
What can be done?
Across the thread, the most repeated advice was to swap passive consumption for satisfying activities.
Some responses focused more directly on self-reliance. One commenter said they now spend time growing food, fixing issues in their home and car, and splitting wood to heat their home.
Other ideas were simpler still, like going to the public library, spending time in parks, inviting friends over, volunteering, joining mutual aid, or choosing a challenge such as learning a language, fostering a dog, or working through a complete author's catalog.
Several commenters also stressed values and presence over chasing the latest, greatest new production.
One commenter captured the shift in just four words: "There is no upgrade."
Where can I learn more?
Owning less and building life around practical skills can look a number of different ways in everyday life.
• In Australia, a family of four moved into a 20-foot container to live mortgage-free.
• At forest's edge, one man chose a tiny off-grid home and kept one foot in society.
• In Portugal, a couple said eight years off-grid brought simplicity and a hundred new jobs.
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